Butterfly Sparks Designs

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Let My Circle Be Unbroken...

Last night seemed to be Marriage 101 at work.

Since I'm a single, I took notes.

I received a new admission patient first off, early in the afternoon.  After we'd gotten her settled into her new room, her husband came and sat with her for the afternoon.  He wore cowboy boots, a light blue suit jacket, navy blue suit pants, and a very large beige cowboy hat.  I kept having to look for his face under that hat :)

As I was assessing my new patient, Mrs. Phillips*, and asking her questions, Mr. Phillips, her husband, began to ask me some questions.  He finished up with, "Are you married?"

"Nope," I said.

"Well, sit down and let me tell you a few things."

He waited for me to actually sit down :)  (Nurses don't really sit, so I had to actually go outside and search for a chair).

"First things first," he said. "Your husband's got to be a Christian.  That's most important.  I don't know if you are a person of... faith, and don't be one of those girls who thinks she can make him into a Christian after the 'I do' at the altar.  If he ain't been a Christian all along, he won't 'poof' turn into one because of your wiley ways.  Got it?"

"Got it," I said.

"Okay, now look, if he's a  Christian, and he's REALLY a Christian, then good.  This here's my wife of 60 years.  60 years and she's still my wife; my queen; my lover; my friend; my best woman.  Now that hasn't changed, and in fact it's grown deeper.  You've got to have a Christian man."

I smiled.

He went on to talk to me about divorce, the challenges of blended families, and other things.

"Now, let's circle up and pray," he then said.

The Phillips' daughter was in the room, so the four of us, plus the family's Pastor who had somehow slipped into the room in the middle of all this- we joined hands and Mr. Phillips began to pray.

"Lord, thank you for my wife.  And thank you for a Christian nurse.  We pray for her RIGHT NOW, God, that you will send her a Godly husband.  That you will bless her home that one day she might say, 'Let the circle of my own family be unbroken.'  Bless her in all she does.  Amen."

Amen.  I received it!  I felt so blessed to be prayed for like that.  A little heaven dropped onto my earth last night, and it felt lovely :)

Later in the evening, I stopped by my patient's room to check on him, and his roommate motioned me over.  His roommate, Mr. Oneida,* and Mr. Oneida's wife were watching television together.

"Say, will you tell my nurse I need a sleeping pill?"

"Yes, sir, I will."  After helping him out with a few things, he said, "Say, are you married?"

I must have had a sign on my forehead last night or something.

"No, sir, I'm not."

"Well, we'll be married 60 years next month."

"What's the secret to 60 years?" I asked them.  I've learned to ask my sweet older patients this, because the answers are often humorous and heartwarming at the same time :)

"Love. One. Another.  That's it.  All these people who get divorced and say it can't work- well it can.  Give it a go- and Don't.  Give.  Up.  That's the key.  It's really simple and people make it all complicated.  Choose to love one another.  Sometimes it's a choice.  But the choice eventually leaks over into a feeling, just give it time.  It can work, and it is a blessing to remain together for years and years.  I'm proud of my wife, and I love her."

Mrs. Oneida puffed up her chest at that :)

I believe God was giving me hope last night in the form of my patients.  It is easy to look out over this crazy world and wonder if your simple girl's hopes and dreams for love and marriage will become reality.  You look out at all the media, the lust, the ravages on family, and fear can easily set in.  You wonder sometimes if what you still want to reach for is possible.

My patients last night reminded me it is- in a very heartwarming way. 

I pray we Americans aren't losing the lessons our older generation would teach us if we would simply stop to listen.  That's one reason sharing with you what they teach me is so important- they have a wealth of wisdom to offer.  I'm blessed to sit among these elders each night I go into work.  Seems foolish sometimes, in comparsion to the ways of the world.  But God said He would use the foolish things of this world to confound the wise :)


  1. That is so sweet! I love how God works in our lives...sending what we need, just at the very moment we need it! :)

  2. What a precious gift! I just love it when God uses my patients to encourage me! Praising God for sending some encouragers your way!